Is the Salon or Day Spa a Place for Children?
February 24, 2010 by Christine - From Dates to Diapers
Filed under What do YOU think?, rants
Just what I needed.
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From the moment I made the appointment I was looking forward to two blissful hours at my favorite salon, while the tips of my toes and fingers could be transformed into pieces of art. With giddy anticipation I was imagining this time that I didn’t have to spend answering questions, repeating myself three times, or acting the referee.
But, this afternoon, there was one mom who sat at the station next to me who didn’t have the same thing in mind. Or maybe she did, but was sorely disappointed. She had her young boys with her. They were five and three, I think I heard her say.
As this woman walked in, her two adorable boys following behind her, with action figures in their little hands, I couldn’t help but think she was nuts. I may have even whispered, “Wow, she’s brave.”
Now, if you know me at all, you know that I love my kids. So much. Enough to spend almost every waking moment (and many, many sleeping moments) with all six of them. Sure, I go on a short trip or spend an afternoon away, every once in a while, but for the most part I spend all day of every day with my kids.
No matter what your circumstances, I truly think that every mom deserves some alone time. Time to spend with girlfriends or get your nails done, take a long walk or enjoy a date night with your hubby. It’s healthy and necessary.
There will come a time when I will bring Julia with me, but getting my nails done today was my time. {Does that sound selfish?} There were several other women enjoying the pampering, while relaxing peacefully.
All of this was interrupted, however, by noisy chatter and the battle cries of young boys. Beautiful sounds. Sounds that the owner didn’t think belonged in his salon.
The first time this woman was asked to keep her kids quiet, she sternly looked at her boys and told them to keep their voices down. Then came the sounds of their toys, at which point she was politely asked if she would like to come back another time. Perhaps a time when she would not have to bring her boys.
She quietly declined the offer, stating that when she walks out the door she will never come back. She held both boys in her lap for a while. Later she gave her older son her phone on which to play, while her younger son fell asleep in her lap and her nails were finished.
To her credit, I did not hear one more peep out of her children. But, she had to be the most relaxed and laid-back mom to consider this a relaxing and peaceful time. Surely it had to be nerve-racking.
Should these two young boys have been in the salon this afternoon?
Of course I don’t know this woman’s circumstances. Maybe she didn’t have any choice but to bring her boys with her this afternoon. Perhaps her babysitter canceled on her, or her husband never showed up to treat their kids to ice cream, as promised. I will never know.
I do know this: I have postponed appointments when my sitter canceled, and I don’t walk in to the salon until I have waived goodbye to my kids as they drive off with daddy. I have also gone many weeks without being able to get my nails done, simply because I couldn’t get away for an appointment.
I’m okay with that because, in my opinion, the salon is just no place for children.
Yes, unless the salon clearly said “no children allowed”. I’m right with her, sometimes it’s not possible to go without our children. I understand had they had been breaking things and running about. Sounds like typical children and their chatter.
.-= kristin´s last blog ..Brooklin Has A New Toy =-.
Considering the fumes at the nail salons I would never take my children. I guess I mainly say that because I hate the smell of nail polish and all that stuff and it’s a good thing I am not a girly girl.
It depends on your point of view. Is it more important for her to be able to get her nails done when she wants or is it more important for the rest of the guests to have a tranquil experience? Does her desire to get the service now trump the wishes of the business owner who thought that young children were a safety risk or mood changer he didn’t want in his business.
.-= career girl´s last blog ..Sham Rock 2010 – San Diego, California =-.
Wow – good question. I would not want my children around the fumes, so would not even consider taking them. I also realize it would be impossible to relax having my 2 & 4 yo around and so wouldn’t want to waste my money on something that wouldn’t be fully satisfying. Then I think of the other people, who were hoping for a relaxing, peaceful time and may be interrupted by my children. My answer would be no, it’s not a place for children. Next I’m now thinking of my chiropractor, where I go for relief of horrible heachaches, but where I always take my children. Dr. Casazza (in Sac)and his staff are incredible and make my children seem more than welcome (they even have a little play area for kids), but am I being inconsiderate of the other patients? I sure hope not.
.-= Mindy´s last blog ..Mommy’s Heart Tonight =-.
As a hairstylist and someone what works in salons. I think that kids in salons is disruptive to other clients trying to enjoy their alone time. Although I understand that things happen babysittiers cancel… It is not fair to other clients not to mention yourself to have their service disrupted. Also there are a lot of dangerous chemicals and expensive equipment. I have had kids run around in my salon and break other stylists equipment! While parents sit on and ignore their kids. It sounds like this mom was being reasonable and paid attention to her kids. But I still think that she should not have brought her kids into the salon. Also if she was asked politely to leave she should not be offended but should have understood that kids in a salon is not a good idea! People dont understand this sometimes. I have kids in my salon all the time but if they are getting out of hand we have to ask them to stop. ITs not fair to the stylists to have to parent these peoples kids. But we are also a family salon and we understand bringing the kids in for cuts. But parents need to be considerate to other customers and other clients!
Sorry for the rant… this is something that I deal with on a daily basis!
PS: I STILL have your stuff!
Thank you for your point of view, Danielle. I think that while your perspective certainly is a bit different from ours, it provides much insight.
Unfortunately consideration for others isn’t a priority for most.
I totally agree with your comment. I’m a salon owner also, I don’t want to be rude to the clients but on the other hand, how rude are they being bringing thier children into the salon for everyone else to deal with. When I go to the salon, it is me time. I don’t expect to have my services done in the middle of daycare!
I really, really dont think kids belong in salons. Its not fair to the kids or the other customers. When I go to get my nails done I want to be able to enjoy some grown up time. And kids shouldnt have to sit there bored out of their minds while mommy gets her nails done.
.-= Stephanie@The Blue Zoo´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday ~ Baby Years =-.
I wouldn’t dream of having my nails done or anything like that. I work with my hands so much it would be a waste of time and money. But if I did, I’d find out what the preferences are of the salon. I take my kids everywhere with me, so if they weren’t allowed, I’d go somewhere else. I think it was rude for them to try to get the lady to leave. There should have been some statement of the policy somewhere, if children aren’t allowed.
.-= Cindy ´s last blog ..DownEast Basics Giveaway =-.
Technically they didn’t ask her to leave, but I hear ya…. Policies should certainly be in place if children who are not receiving services are not welcome.
I don’t think a salon needs a peolicy to tell people not to bring kids. Any public place where you can’t properly supervise your kids, you should leave them at home. And I’m sorry, but sitting with wet nails doesn’t allow you to do so. As a paying customer I would be really frustrated to find kids at my nail salon.
I agree, to an extent.
I don’t know about you, but I have never brought my kids (nursing babies accepted) to restaurants that aren’t kid-friendly – You know the ones with mood lighting and no kids menus? There is not necessarily a policy in place for those establishments, but children are children and just don’t belong.
Just like a fancy restaurant, this salon/day spa may not have thought they needed a policy. Perhaps they should re-think it.
I guess it depends on how well behaved your children are. I always take the girls [2 year old twins] with me when I go. I have never had an issue. They sit down & are very well behaved. I do make sure I bring enough books for them to look at though.
.-= abby´s last blog ..Help! =-.
Honestly, I think girls are different. And, I make no apologies for my “double standard.”
I personally would not allow it. I agree with every point you made. When I went with my girlfriends a while back, we all sat back and even closed our eyes while getting our toes done. I could not imagine doing this with kids in the background. People do in fact go to salons for that alone time, adult time, relaxing time and to get away from the kiddos for a little bit. I think it’s rude to overstep that boundary of invading on someone else’s enjoyable experience. Not to mention the fumes and the fact that I just don’t think boys in general should be a salon..but that’s the old fashioned gal coming out in me;)
.-= Lori´s last blog ..Wrangling Hummingbirds! =-.
I think it depends on the type of salon you are going to. If it’s a busy nail salon with a lot of activity and noise then I say take them along. However, if it’s a nice salon that advertises that it is a relaxing environment I think it is rude and inconsiderate to take children along. I have 4 children, all girls, they would just LOVE to go be big and get their nails done with me – which is exactly what we do at the nail salon. But, when I need some Mommy time, which is usually due to a gift certificate from my wonderful husband, that is my reward for spending 99.9% of my time playing with them, taking care of them, feeding them, cleaning up after them, nursing them, teaching them…all the wonderful things we get to do as a Mom. Additionally, other clients are there to relax….they are paying, probably a lot more than the nail salon, to be in a relaxing environment where they can be pampered for a couple hours and it’s not right for someone to steal that reward away from them by bringing their children to the salon. I LOVE MY KIDS, but that’s not the time to bring them along. I have cancelled MANY appointments and rescheduled my Mommy time many many times because I didn’t have a sitter so I don’t think that’s a good reason to bring them. Reschedule when you do have a sitter and you and the other clients can all relax and enjoy being pampered.
.-= Mandy´s last blog ..Ebates & Other Online Rebate Sites =-.
I whole-heartedly agree that the type of salon is a big factor. Bellagio isn’t a walk-in nail salon (although they do service walk-ins). It is, instead, an “upscale day salon” specializing in “high-end” services.
You know sometimes life just doesn’t work out perfectly for moms. Kids are our reality and if they are well-behaved, I see no reason not to bring your children along. It teaches children how to behave in various settings and interact appropriately with adults. Children are our future. Lets be a community and work together to mold the next generation.
-FringeGirl
Of course children are our future, however I respectfully disagree that it is appropriate for children to be allowed any where and every where that adults are. They are still children, after all.
I’m not trying to be rude
I absolutely think it’s okay. Some mothers don’t have a choice they can’t afford a baby sitter or don’t have one.
I absolutely hate when people expect everywhere they go to be quiet and nice. Kids are not going to be 100% angels all the time. People get fustrated at stores, restaurants, malls, salons everywhere you can think of. They are kids get over it. I know majority of bloggers get a lot of free time i’ve heard. Trips, me time whatever. I on the other hand have only been away from my kids for hours or when i was giving birth. I take them with me to the doctors, getting haircuts, everywhere. I don’t have the luxery of family near me, or sitters, or being able to afford one. If someone gets fustrated with my kids noise level, i of course ask my kids to quiet down, and then I tell the person that kids are kids, and I don’t see a sign saying no kids allowed. so deal with it.
.-= Brandy´s last blog ..Barbie and A Mermaids Tale DVD Review =-.
Not trying to be rude eh?? riiiiight.
I don’t know what bloggers you know that have tons of free time but considering I work (online) for 12hrs, offline 9hrs offline and get about 3hrs sleep, I look forward to quiet times at a salon where it’s meant to be a relaxing environment, getting pampered.
If you can’t afford a babysitter than you probably should be spending money at a salon either. Just my 2 cents.
.-= Lori´s last blog ..Wrangling Hummingbirds! =-.
I have been to a salon once in my life as a gift.
All I am saying is that when I had children I gave up my freedom.
All iam saying is some people don’t have the Money for a babysitter or have family near by. When a blogger goes on a trip, they are working, but they also get leisure time, and they are not with their family.
.-= Brandy´s last blog ..Hannah Montana: Miley says goodbye dvd giveaway =-.
Great question. I normally look at salon time, as my time, alone, relaxing and getting pampered. I have never taken either of my kids to the salon with me, however I know many moms that do take their daughters with them, even young, toddlers. The little ones get a mani and pedi just like mom. This is great. Distracting to other moms at times, I’m sure. Now your incident was different, the lady brought her sons and they weren’t going to be getting anything done. But sometimes there are incidents when sitters fall through, plans change. She probably had an appt and felt that canceling wouldn’t work for her. Which in this case is ok for herself but not others in for a relaxing day. And as long as her kids were under control, I see no problem with it. Maybe she was a single mom and just needed some pampering, even though her children would be in tow.
.-= Joanna´s last blog ..Hash brown Casserole – What’s for Dinner Thursday =-.
I take my kids with me sometimes, but I try not to. BUT, I have two girls. I have been getting my nails done for years and my girls are now 14 and 9. For the last several years, I usually fork over an extra $10 and get THEIR nails painted, too. Makes them feel included and helps them not be so bored.
Now if we’re talking LITTLE kids, and most especially BOYS, I’d leave them at home. If I couldn’t go without them, I wouldn’t go.
As far as not being able to afford a sitter to watch your kids… if someone can’t afford a sitter, why are they spending money getting their nails done anyways?
.-= Sincerely, Jenni´s last blog ..The Real Game of Life =-.
I don’t get my nails done…and usually take my kids everywhere with me…but if I know I don’t want to risk them getting too loud, I’ll make other arrangements. That being said, I think people in the US are way too sensitive about the behavior of kids. They expect them to be obedient and quiet 100% of the time…even at play areas, you’ll hear parents saying “Don’t jump off of that”. If they can’t jump there, where can they jump? When I lived in Bolivia, I felt much more relaxed about raising my kids, without the scrutiny of onlookers all the time.
My kids go with me everywhere, as well, with the exception of an occasional work trip, date nights with my hubby, and my salon time!
I do agree that most people, especially in public, expect too much of children – children just are not wired to sit still and be quiet all the time, and they must be trained to be obedient. Kids should be allowed to be kids.
THIS is the very reason I do not bring my children to places where they are not allowed to be children (including other people’s houses!).
Salon time??? What’s that?!?!?!?!?!
I have taken my daughter with me as a paying customer. But other times I feel that the salon is too expensive and it is my time to relax and get away from the real world
I like the policy at our local spa … a spa is a place to relax and you can’t do that if there are “little ones” around. Love them to death … have three of my own … but would reschedule my appointment versus jeopardizing “my” time or that of other spa customers.
Atmosphere
Please help us maintain a serene atmosphere for all guests.
Please use your ‘spa voice’ during all services.
Kindly Silent or Turn Off your cell phones during your visit.
To ensure a peaceful atmosphere in the spa and for their safety,
we do not allow children under 6 years of age at this location.
Children 6 and over can only get nail services and
must be accompanied by a parent during the entire visit.
Except for service animals we do not permit animals in the spa.
.-= Mary M.´s last blog ..Nestle Toll House Morsels Coupon & Recipe =-.
Great policy and smart to have it in place!
I don’t believe kids should be there. Honestly. I’ve had this experience as well and it’s unpleasant. Most mothers, or just people, go to the salon or day spa for relaxation and to get away from the hustle of everyday life. I was at the gym, one day, and there was one associate entertaining a few kids at a table. Keep in mind, our gym does NOT have a place for kids nor a daycare service. They just had one associate watch them because the parents were at the gym.
.-= Krissy @ ArtsyMom´s last blog ..CONAIR MINI PRO GIVEAWAY: Retails $24.99 =-.
You are right Christine; a salon is no place for children. I usually go to the salon to get my hair done and I have seen some women come in tow with their young children! My son is four and I break out in hives when he is loud in the library! So, I know that taking him to the salon is out of the question!
I do not think that people should take their kids to a spa or even nail salon with them. I am like you and when I go it is to totally treat myself and be able to relax. Just as I don’t want to hear my kids beautiful voices, I don’t want to hear anybody elses kids either. It may sound mean, but just being honest.
.-= Mel’s Box of Chocolates´s last blog ..Sticker Stamps? =-.
Funny you’re talking about this. I haven’t had my hair cut since September and have been pondering the fact that its hard to get to a salon w/o kids during the day.
I do think that at nice salons where people do go to spend money to relax and be pampered that children (at least noisy ones) aren’t the best accessories. But unless its a known rule – “No Children Allowed”- can’t blame a mom who brings them. Maybe this is the only chance she can get to get her hair done.
.-= Tracy @HallofFameMoms´s last blog ..Tar-jay! =-.
I agree that she should not have brought her sons to the salon. Even if she was having a relaxing time with them, it is rude to assume that it won’t bother the other guests. Or even worse, if she didn’t care that it could bother others. But, I also don’t think that the saloon owner handled the situation well. He should have talked to her about it after, instead of potentially embarrassing her in front of everyone. All around, it sounds like an uncomfortable situation for everyone.
I think that unless the salon has a policy not allowing young children, she had every right to bring them with her. I can certainly see why she would be offended.
.-= Cat @ 3 Kids and Us´s last blog ..Crock Pot Cooking for a Party Crowd – Pot Roast Recipe =-.
I seriously just got my hair cut yesterday and had to bring my son. This is not a “spa” type place, but it is nicer than a Super Cuts. My stylist has a son my son’s age and she said I could bring a DVD. I also packed his lunch and some books and toys. Unfortunately she couldn’t find the remote to her TV to make the DVD play.
I would have definitely preferred to leave my son at home, but this time it wasn’t an option and I really needed a hair cut! He was “decent”, but talking to the other clients and stylists.
I guess I feel like if you’re getting your nails done it’s not a necessity and if you have to bring your children to a nice place with you, you shouldn’t be there with them. On the other hand, there are definitely places that you just have to take your kids. But a nail salon is probably not on my list for that!
Day spas and walk-in salons are very different, in my opinion.
Firmly believe that a NICE Day Spa/ Salon is no place for children. As a mom, I need occasional peace and quiet. If you are going to pay the money for a quiet massage, mani/pedi, haircut whatever; you should be able to enjoy each moment without interuption.
.-= Amber´s last blog ..Two boys and a Gator =-.
I have to agree with those who say she shouldn’t have brought the kids. Getting your nails done is not a necessity, but a luxury. (Something like a doctor appointment is different, however.) So if her babysitter cancelled, she should have rescheduled. And if you can’t afford babysitting, why are you getting a manicure? It’s always been a pet peeve of mine to see people who complain about money regularly shell out 15 or 20 or 30 dollars (I’m not even sure what it costs!) to get their nails done.
I do give her some credit for staying when asked to leave. I wouldn’t have had the nerve!
I’m not sure I could have stayed either… She was a gutsy one, that mama!
Everyone has already said everything, and I do not take my boys ANYWHERE, but that is not something I recommend.
{they are crazy}
Great food for thought!
.-= To Think Is To Create´s last blog ..The Point =-.
okay i was not trying to be rude, just stating my opinion. After reading some of the comments after mine, i feel like no one thinks their are low income families in this world. It kindof hurts, because i don’t go to salons anymore. If I did I would take my kids.
.-= Brandy´s last blog ..Hannah Montana: Miley says goodbye dvd giveaway =-.
Although I have been married for many years, I haven’t been blessed with children (yet). I am just chiming in to say that I think it is very easy for parents to forget what it is like NOT to have children. I know that my experience at the salon would be interrupted by hearing small children playing and I absolutely love kids.
I say the same thing about restaurants. What may seem like not a lot of noise to parents sounds very loud to me because I think it almost becomes easy for parents to block out normal “kid” noises.
Just offering another perspective…