50 Rules for Dads of Daughters {by Michael Mitchell}

by Christine - From Dates to Diapers on August 30, 2011

I was in tears as I read through this list, as I’m sure many grown daughters will be. Mothers – bookmark this list of rules and encourage your daughter’s daddy to read them, memorize them, and put them in to action. And, to all you Dads out there – be sure you pay close attention and heed these wise words.

About Michael
Michael Mitchell is an (almost) thirty-something dad who blogs daily tips and life lessons for dads of daughters at lifetoheryears.com. He spends his days practicing the arts of fatherhood and husbandry, while attempting to be a man of God and a professional raiser of philanthropic funds. On the rare occasion he’s not tied up with the aforementioned and other pursuits of awesomeness, he enjoys fighting street gangs for local charities and drinking from a cup that’s half full. Bookmark Life To Her Years, follow Michael on Twitter, and “like” him on Facebook for more “rules”.

1. Love her mom. Treat her mother with respect, honor, and a big heaping spoonful of public displays of affection. When she grows up, the odds are good she’ll fall in love with and marry someone who treats her much like you treated her mother. Good or bad, that’s just the way it is. I’d prefer good.

2. Always be there. Quality time doesn’t happen without quantity time. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence. Be genuinely interested in the things that interest her. She needs her dad to be involved in her life at every stage. Don’t just sit idly by while she add years to her… add life to her years.

3. Save the day. She’ll grow up looking for a hero. It might as well be you. She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life. Rise to the occasion. Red cape and blue tights optional.

4. Savor every moment you have together. Today she’s crawling around the house in diapers, tomorrow you’re handing her the keys to the car, and before you know it, you’re walking her down the aisle. Some day soon, hanging out with her old man won’t be the bees knees anymore. Life happens pretty fast. You better cherish it while you can.

5. Pray for her. Regularly. Passionately. Continually.

6. Buy her a glove and teach her to throw a baseball. Make her proud to throw like a girl… a girl with a wicked slider.

7. She will fight with her mother. Choose sides wisely.

8. Go ahead. Buy her those pearls.

9. Of course you look silly playing peek-a-boo. You should play anyway.

10. Enjoy the wonder of bath time.

11. There will come a day when she asks for a puppy. Don’t over think it. At least one time in her life, just say, “Yes.”

12. It’s never too early to start teaching her about money. She will still probably suck you dry as a teenager… and on her wedding day.

13. Make pancakes in the shape of her age for breakfast on her birthday. In a pinch, donuts with pink sprinkles and a candle will suffice.

14. Buy her a pair of Chucks as soon as she starts walking. She won’t always want to wear matching shoes with her old man.


Photo Credit :: Danielle Rocke Toews

15. Dance with her. Start when she’s a little girl or even when she’s a baby. Don’t wait ‘til her wedding day.

16. Take her fishing. She will probably squirm more than the worm on your hook. That’s OK.

17. Learn to say no. She may pitch a fit today, but someday you’ll both be glad you stuck to your guns.

18. Tell her she’s beautiful. Say it over and over again. Someday an animated movie or “beauty” magazine will try to convince her otherwise.

19. Teach her to change a flat. A tire without air need not be a major panic inducing event in her life. She’ll still call you crying the first time it happens.

20. Take her camping. Immerse her in the great outdoors. Watch her eyes fill with wonder the first time she sees the beauty of wide open spaces. Leave the iPod at home.

21. Let her hold the wheel. She will always remember when daddy let her drive.

22. She’s as smart as any boy. Make sure she knows that.

23. When she learns to give kisses, she will want to plant them all over your face. Encourage this practice.

24. Knowing how to eat sunflower seeds correctly will not help her get into a good college. Teach her anyway.

25. Letting her ride on your shoulders is pure magic. Do it now while you have a strong back and she’s still tiny.

26. It is in her nature to make music. It’s up to you to introduce her to the joy of socks on a wooden floor.

27. If there’s a splash park near your home, take her there often. She will be drawn to the water like a duck to a puddle.

28. She will eagerly await your return home from work in the evenings. Don’t be late.

29. If her mom enrolls her in swim lessons, make sure you get in the pool too. Don’t be intimidated if there are no other dads there. It’s their loss.

30. Never miss her birthday. In ten years she won’t remember the present you gave her. She will remember if you weren’t there.

31. Teach her to roller skate. Watch her confidence soar.

32. Let her roll around in the grass. It’s good for her soul. It’s not bad for yours either.

33. Take her swimsuit shopping. Don’t be afraid to veto some of her choices, but resist the urge to buy her full-body beach pajamas.

34. Somewhere between the time she turns three and her sixth birthday, the odds are good that she will ask you to marry her. Let her down gently.

35. She’ll probably want to crawl in bed with you after a nightmare. This is a good thing.

36. Few things in life are more comforting to a crying little girl than her father’s hand. Never forget this.

37. Introduce her to the swings at your local park. She’ll squeal for you to push her higher and faster. Her definition of “higher and faster” is probably not the same as yours. Keep that in mind.

38. When she’s a bit older, your definition of higher and faster will be a lot closer to hers. When that day comes, go ahead… give it all you’ve got.

39. Holding her upside down by the legs while she giggles and screams uncontrollably is great for your biceps. WARNING: She has no concept of muscle fatigue.

40. She might ask you to buy her a pony on her birthday. Unless you live on a farm, do not buy her a pony on her birthday. It’s OK to rent one though.

41. Take it easy on the presents for her birthday and Christmas. Instead, give her the gift of experiences you can share together.

42. Let her know she can always come home. No matter what.

43. Remember, just like a butterfly, she too will spread her wings and fly some day. Enjoy her caterpillar years.

44. Write her a handwritten letter every year on her birthday. Give them to her when she goes off to college, becomes a mother herself, or when you think she needs them most.

45. Learn to trust her. Gradually give her more freedom as she gets older. She will rise to the expectations you set for her.

46. When in doubt, trust your heart. She already does.

47. When your teenage daughter is upset, learning when to engage and when to back off will add years to YOUR life. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

48. Ice cream covers over a multitude of sins. Know her favorite flavor.

49. This day is coming soon. There’s nothing you can do to be ready for it. The sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be.

50. Today she’s walking down the driveway to get on the school bus. Tomorrow she’s going off to college. Don’t blink.

Photo Credits can be found at the bottom of Michael’s original post.

**9/15/11**This post has resonated so well with daughters and fathers, mothers and grandfathers, and has received many beautiful and heartfelt comments. As much as it pains me, I have had to disable the comment feature. If you have a comment you would like for the author to see, please contact him via his blog, or email me directly at christineATfromdatestodiapersDOTcom and I’ll be sure to pass it along to Michael.

Raising Kids to be Good Friends

by Christine - From Dates to Diapers on August 26, 2011

Evangeline Denmark is an author and blogger. She co-wrote The Dragon and The Turtle and The Dragon and The Turtle Go on Safari with her mother, best-selling novelist Donita K. Paul. Evangeline shares sympathetic humor for women who don’t have time to breathe in and breathe out on her blog Breath In Breathe Out. You can find out more about the adventures of Padraig the dragon and Roger the turtle at www.dragonandturtle.com Follow on Twitter at @EvangelineD.

“Be nice,” I tell my two little boys.

“Share.”

“Be a good friend.”

They look at me with blank expressions. And go right back to their world where they are supreme ruler of all, entitled to the first and best of everything.

But when I let them choose the game we play, divvy up my favorite candy bar, or ask them what their favorite part of the day was, their crash-course lives stop for a moment. They laugh. They engage with me. They learn little pieces of what makes up a relationship.

In the writing world, we call this concept “Show, Don’t Tell,” and it’s one of the most important rules authors should follow.

When my mother, novelist Donita K. Paul, and I were brainstorming ideas for children’s picture books, we realized that friendship is a skill we praise but struggle to teach. After all, learning to be a good friend takes more than hearing empty phrases like “Be nice to each other,” or “Share your toys.”

Our picture books, The Dragon and the Turtle and The Dragon and the Turtle Go on Safari were written with Showing in mind. The characters, adventure-loving Roger the turtle and kind-hearted Padraig the dragon, model the steps of friendship for young readers. From talking about likes and dislikes to putting your own wants aside to help another, the Roger and Padraig stories teach by example.

Plus, kiddos love learning about the five senses as Padraig helps Roger find his way home in The Dragon and The Turtle. (And mommies love the Chocolate Chip Snapper recipe in the back of the book.) And if your little ones struggle with night time fears, The Dragon and the Turtle Go on Safari will help them learn to combat fear with the security of friendship.

So, if you’re like me and you find yourself spouting rules and wishing you could better convey the real meaning behind your words, then check out The Dragon and the Turtle and The Dragon and the Turtle Go on Safari at your local Christian bookstore, Barnes & Noble, Amazon, or Christian Book Distributors. And good luck with raising your kids to be good friends!

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Five 15-Minute Sabbaticals To Take With Your Kids! {A Guest Post}

by Christine - From Dates to Diapers on August 19, 2011

Joanne Kraft loves to encourage moms. Her nonfiction book, Just Too Busy – Taking Your Family on a Radical Sabbatical is the true story of her family’s twelve month time-out and the lessons learned along the way. Joanne has been published in Today’s Christian Woman, In Touch, ParentLife, Kyria, Thriving Family, and P31 Woman Magazine. Visit her at her blog www.JoanneKraft.com

“I’m bored!” Two words that can cause the most even-tempered parent to lose their cool.

My husband usually responds this way, “You’re bored because you’re boring!”

He’s such a cool drink on a hot summer’s day.

The truth is, with children being plugged in, turned on and tuned out, coming up with things to do that strike their fancy can often times be a struggle.

Image by Skip Brown

Here are five 15-minute sabbaticals you can take with your kids this summer.

  1. Have a picnic lunch in the backyard. Slow-paced summer days don’t have to be boring. Slap together a PB&J and throw out a blanket and whalla! Lay out on the grass and practice a few minutes of cloud gazing together.
  2. Read a book. Turn off the TV. Put down the iPod. Back away from the XBOX. Slip a hardbound book in your child’s hands and encourage them to read a chapter aloud to YOU.
  3. Take a walk. We live in a neighborhood filled with children, yet, if you were to walk around our block you’d never know it. Kids are inside being entertained by electronic devices all day long. Get some Vitamin D and bring your children out into the light for a fifteen minute stroll.
  4. Write a letter to an elderly relative. Letter-writing is a lost art. Email has become the bully on the block, but nothing will bring more joy to your grandma, great-aunt Melba, or cousin Jimmy, than a handwritten letter from your child.
  5. Hand your child a broom. Nothing cures the summer blues faster than chores around the house. I am always amazed at how fast their creative juices begin to flow when we give them something to do that includes PineSol, Windex, and some good ol’ elbow grease!

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3 Life Lessons From a 10 Month Old {A Guest Post By @DaddybyDefault}

by Christine - From Dates to Diapers on August 13, 2011

Craig Grella is a serial entrepreneur, tech geek, author, and father who loves writing and blogging on topics like business, law, parenting, and entertainment. His blog, Daddy by Default, is a resource featuring cool stuff for stay-at-home dads. You can also find him changing diapers on twitter @daddybydefault.

Before my daughter was born I sought advice from every parent I knew. They all said the same thing: your life as you know it ends; you have no time for friends, you’ll never see another movie in a theater, car rides are miserable, plane rides are worse, and what little sleep you get will be interrupted by a crying, snotty, slobbering, dirty diaper baby. Then they would follow with, “it’ll be the best thing that ever happened to you!”

Sure, when they’re young, babies just eat, drink, cry and poop. When they start walking you need to watch them like hawks, and when they get older you have to worry about them dating a jerk. And maybe, in between, you get a few ugly ties for father’s day and a couple of lopsided mugs on your birthday. To me, the sacrifice seemed greater than what the parents got back, which is why I never understood how we could give up so much and be happier for it.

But after just ten months of being a dad I’ve come to realize what every one of those parents told me was true; I was happier than I’d ever been. Without speaking a single word, my daughter had reminded me of the mystery and wonder in life, and how everything around us contains magic.

In particular, she taught me three things which I believe have made me a better person.

Patience

One of the first things I learned from my daughter was patience. Normally, both my wife and I were consumed with work. We would come home after a long day at the office, scarf down dinner, and be back on email in under five minutes. But babies don’t care about your schedule, and feeding them is a much more time consuming and deliberate act. You have to clean the bottle, warm the milk, and feed her only an ounce at a time, stopping often to burp her, or suffer the consequences of gassy fussiness. Most times, feedings took more than an hour each. That was a big adjustment for me, but it forced me to slow down.

There’s not much to do when you’re feeding a baby, so you sit and think. I would reflect on my day; about the things I had done wrong, or about areas in my life where I could improve. Sometimes, I’d make a to-do list and when I did have some free time, instead of wasting it on movies or television, I would cross tasks off the list and get things done. Other times, I would just sit and watch my wife feed the baby, and we would talk about each other’s day, something we’d rarely stop to do in the past. Over time, our baby’s schedule came to more closely mirror our own, but we still take extra time around meals to sit and chat about our day, and to watch our daughter play. The time together has brought my wife and I closer, and our relationship has blossomed into something more meaningful that what we had before.

I also don’t find myself in as much of a rush as I used to be. I slowed down in the car, mostly because I want to be safer with the baby on board, but also because I’m enjoying the journey, not just getting to the destination.

Empathy

Anytime you get a few kids together, one of them is bound to have a melt down, and when he does, chances are, the rest of the babies will start crying too. Before long, it’s a scream fest and the parents are digging through diaper bags trying to find a clean teething toy to pacify their child. At first, I thought it might be the loud noise that makes the other babies cry; like maybe it was just too much for their little ears. But after studying the chain reaction in several settings, I noticed something interesting.

After the first baby starts crying, the others stop what they’re doing and look over to see what’s going on. The expression on their faces change to a blank, quizzical look, as if to ask that baby in their own silent language, “why are you crying?” Then, the babies look to their parents with that same quizzical look, this time asking “why aren’t you doing anything, can’t you see he’s in pain?” A few moments later, the blank stares turn into frowns and the silent ones start crying too. After seeing this in action a dozen times, it finally hit me. These teared up little toddlers are empathizing with the one in pain. They don’t know why he’s crying, but they recognize the hurt and suffering, and they feel it too.

It amazes me that my daughter can feel the pain of another baby just by looking into his eyes. I wonder when we, as adults, lost the ability to empathize with other people. When I see how a kind word can brighten someone’s day, I wonder wonder why the corporate world I came from confuses empathy with weakness, and why those who display it are rarely rewarded. I never took much time to think about other people and their situations, but now I take the time to stop and help the lady change her tire in the pouring rain; because I know without that help she might not make it home in time to feed her kid, or to talk with her husband, or to help her sick father.

Wonder

Comedian Ray Romano has a routine where he jokes about his kids, saying all he needs to do to entertain them for hours is to jiggle a ring of keys in front of them. I always laughed at that joke because it seemed so absurd, but I learned exactly what he meant one day when I gave my daughter an empty tissue box to play with.

First she batted it around between her hands. Then she fell to her back and pulled it to her stomach, and later she sat on the box and flattened it out. Then she would use it to slide across the floor, and eventually to chase the dog around the house. All the while she was absolutely captivated by that simple piece of cardboard. It didn’t have any blinking lights or play any catchy music, but to her it was the coolest toy in the world.

Babies look at everything with a sense of awe and wonder. Even the simplest things, which we take for granted, are new and amazing to babies. My daughter still laughs when we turn the lights on and off. She can’t figure out how it works, but she doesn’t need to. She just gets a kick out of the light turning into dark turning into light again. She doesn’t know how the ceiling fan works either, but that doesn’t stop her from looking at it for what seems like hours without blinking. She doesn’t know what a cell phone is, but it makes me smile when she recognizes her mom’s voice coming over the speakerphone.

Most of the time we only pay attention to the things that help us do our jobs, or to the people who can get us the stuff we want. There are so many interesting things out there, and if we stop for just a minute to look at them from a different angle – to spend a little more time with them than we normally would, I think we would all see much more beauty in the world.

Patience, empathy, and wonder. Three things my daughter taught me, and I’m glad she did, because the world is a much more beautiful place now than it was just a few months ago.

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Dessert for Nine – Banana Split Bites {A Guest Post By @3kidsandus}

July 30, 2011

Tweet Cat Davis is the professional mom blog author of 3 Kids and Us where she shares her life as a police officer’s wife, mom to three young children, love of traveling Illinois, family recipes and serving as a mom brand ambassador through product reviews. You can find Cat on twitter @3kidsandus One thing people [...]

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4 Lighting Tips to Guarantee Fab Pictures {A Guest Post by @marriedlife}

July 28, 2011

Tweet Krista writes about her family and life adventures at Welcome to Married Life. Most days you can find photos and stories of her daily life and funny things her sons have done. She loves to take pictures and is working towards being a professional photographer… when the babies give her time to breath! You [...]

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Praying to Fall in Love {A Guest Post by @MamaDweeb}

July 25, 2011

Tweet Annie lives in the Kansas woods with her husband and three very young children. She adores writing and sharing her heart with her friends through her posts on MamaDweeb.com. She writes about blogging basics, personal posts and shares her newfound interest in photography. You can chat with her on twitter @MamaDweeb. Life was beyond [...]

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Joy {A Guest Post by @gmunsey}

July 16, 2011

Tweet It’s a bright morning. The air outside is still, heavy and hot. This is Florida in the summer time; humid and sweltering, even before eight o’clock. The air conditioner hums as the the sun beats into the living room from behind the closed white curtains, diffusing filtered light across my sweet pea’s face. She [...]

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Intro To Baby Sign Language: What Age And First Signs

February 18, 2011

Tweet This guest post is brought to us by our friends at the Baby Sign Language site. Enjoy signing with your baby! Baby Signing is a cool way to communicate with your baby or young toddler. It is easy to learn how to sign and the rewards are great. You can start to sign with [...]

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A Relevant Experience

December 16, 2010

Tweet This post was written by my good friend, Elizabeth Norton. Elizabeth is founder of a birthday party idea site and writes about the moments that matter the most, as she tries to find out her true calling in the world and why she is in it. Her journey to Relevant was one that she [...]

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What didn’t you understand about “stay in the backyard?”

April 19, 2010

Tweet Patrick Kopischkie is a freelance writer, husband and parent of two boys: Carter, 4; and Aidan, 1-1/2. As a representative of Springfree Trampoline and having spent several years working with trampoline and related backyard play equipment companies, Patrick is knowledgeable about all aspects of outdoor play, including health & fitness, imagination and safety. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [...]

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10 Ways to Get Rid of Stuff

March 29, 2010

Tweet Spring is in the air and if you’re like us, spring cleaning is on your mind. But does the thought of a garage sale (and all the tagging items and lugging things to the sidewalk) make you want to give up even before you go through your clutter? If so, try these 10 novel [...]

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Secrets to Stellar Credit: Treating Your Credit Score Like Your Kid

March 2, 2010

Tweet Hi, readers! I’m Lucy Duni, mom to a beautiful 18-month-old son and education director for new online financial management tool zendough.com by TransUnion. From one parent to another, I know that credit can be as confusing as raising kids … so allow me to help clear up a few issues. With a full time [...]

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A Blissdom Stroll

February 15, 2010

Tweet When I first started hearing buzz about the surprises Christine had planned for the “Blissdom Babies”, I couldn’t help but be excited! While I don’t attend conferences for the swag — and you’ll never find me pushing or shoving to get extra stuff — it’s always fun to have the opportunity to try products [...]

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Winter Sun Catchers

January 28, 2010

Tweet In my quest for a craft-filled week, I have asked some of my friends to help me out with some fun ideas. Today my friend Amanda has agreed to share a wintery weather craft with us. Amanda is a happy stay-at-home mom to two. She blogs at ohAmanda and Impress Your Kids. She’s a [...]

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Snowy Winter Wonderland

January 26, 2010

Tweet We have a very special guest here at From Dates to Diapers today, to help us out with our challenge to be more purposeful about doing crafts and fun activities with our kids. Marie is a mother of 3 living in Utah. She’s the founder of Make and Takes, a top rated parenting blog [...]

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Bath Crayons

November 22, 2009

Tweet Guest Post by Katie Hostetter from Frugal Femina I visited my cousin this summer on my way to a wedding. We’re building a house and only have a shower right now, so you can imagine my sheer delight when I saw that she had a bathtub. Not just any bathtub, mind you, but a [...]

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Allowance for kids

November 21, 2009

Tweet Allowance…it can be a difficult decision. To give it or not, how much to give, and for what purpose? Through the years I’ve read a lot of great, but conflicting, advice from financial gurus and Christian leaders alike. What I found was that there is more than one right way; we each need to [...]

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Mom Bloggers and Big Brands

November 14, 2009

Tweet I don’t make a habit of addressing articles in which I’ve been quoted, but I’m making an exception here. There is a story on the front page of Sunday’s Los Angeles Times – Blogging moms wooed by food firms – and I’ve allowed Ray to post his thoughts. Please weigh in and let us [...]

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Cruising for $30 a Day?

September 14, 2009

Tweet Since returning from our cruise, Ray has been researching cruise lines, deals, and family-friendly destinations. We are excited to keep our eyes peeled for the best cruise for our family for sometime next year. We plan to set sail when Noah is just a bit older, so we can take our kiddos with us [...]

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Adoption- Bringing a Child Home

September 4, 2009

Tweet Ali here again, as promised, to share with you some great ways to raise the funds to bring your adopted child home to you :: Doing blog designs: I may not be the best blog designer out there, but I have been able to raise a bit of money by doing what I can [...]

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A Heart for Orphans

September 3, 2009

Tweet Hello! I am so excited that Christine has given me the honor of being a guest blogger while she is away! My name is Ali, and I blog over at My God Given Mission Field. I am a stay at home, home schooling mom of 4 from Oregon. We believe that God has given [...]

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