They just don’t make ‘em like they used to.
I remember as a young girl being so excited for the day that I could babysit children besides my siblings! I remember taking a CPR and first aid class to become Red Cross certified. I remember counting down the days ’til I turned 12 and could “legally” babysit, on my own.
I also remember the big responsibility I knew was being given me when loving parents left their children with me for hours, or even days, at a time. They trusted me. But, they also knew that I would do more than just babysit. I wasn’t the type to sit and watch TV with the kids… I was engaging, interactive, and loved on those kids.
No smart phones that enticed me to spend the time texting and chatting with my friends – time that I was being paid to watch someone else’s kids. No internet to distract me from my job, even after my charges were all asleep. I was constantly vigilant and aware of every interaction between siblings, and every bad dream.
Oh, and as a babysitter I never, ever left the house a mess for the parents to come home to. The dishes were always done, toys and messes cleaned up, and everything in order – even if it wasn’t when I had arrived. I just thought that’s what a sitter was to do. I never charged more, but felt that it was part of the job description. Perhaps it was because I went above and beyond that I was invited to Disneyland, or the Grand Canyon, to help with the kids. Ah, I loved it! And, it was all worth a bit of extra work, just so I could spend some extra time with those kids.
Did you babysit as a young adult? Do you have any thoughts on what it means to be a babysitter these days, and what you look for in a good one? I would love to hear, because it’s hard to find a good one these days!
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Oh,yes. The halcyon days when babysitters were enthusiastic teenagers, playing with your children and earning nothing but pocket change.
Hard to find them now. How many teenagers can find time to babysit, with all the SAT prep and band practice and student council and debate and three sports and the charity work they have to do to even get considered at a top tier college?
Not to mention homework.
And the ever-present threat that some whack-job mother is going to accuse them of sexual abuse, or something equally nefarious.
I frequently ended up hiring “professional” babysitters.
Adults.
Who still didn’t clean up the kitchen or spend any engaging time with the kids.
I baby sat my nieces and nephews so I did not go above and beyond. That experience made me realize I didn’t want kids and I didn’t want to watch other people’s kids. Now that I am a mom, I am so scared to get a sitter. I’m nervous about leaving my 6 month old with a 12 year-old, I’m nervous about them texting instead of watching my kid. My step-son is 13 and he still doesn’t baby sit his brother, unless he has to. I think the days of going above and beyond are becoming extinct.
I’m with you, Christine. When I babysat, I played with the kids, cleaned up any messes we made – and any others I saw that I felt comfortable straightening/cleaning without overstepping boundaries – and only when it was all done and the kids were asleep did I sit down to read or watch TV.
I know that’s why I was such a popular babysitter as a teen. Like you, I was invited on family vacations and business trips to all kinds of cool places, and as a young adult I even watched kids for weekends or a week while their parents were out of town.
But it is so, so hard to find teens who do those things now, and I just don’t get it. When did those things stop being expected even though today’s babysitter gets paid at least twice as much as we did?
And like Felicia, knowing what I know now, I just can’t imagine leaving my babies with anyone but our families!
I totally agree. When I was a sitter I would be completely focused on the kids, I usually didn’t even watch tv!
We have been fortunate to find some great sitters, but the best ones are your own. We finally have a child old enough to babysit! I know we can trust her and she does a great job of picking up, lol! And her siblings listen to her most of the time.
Toni
I too was an above and beyond babysitter. I always had a gig lined up. Sadly I never got to go to the Grand Canyon but living in a small town I was always getting referred to others. Even as an adult I did the babysitting thing a lot. It helped being a SAHM mom to have 1 child 5 days a week. I have since put that job in the past.
My daughters who are 10 and 13 have never once been left with any “Sitter”, only family. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Now that my oldest is 13 the 2 stay home together for an hour here or a couple hours there. I am just now getting comfortable leaving them alone.
~Amber~
It’s so true- I babysat at 11-12 yrs old- I wouldn’t trust a kid with a 12 yr old , much less a 17 yr old these days.
It’s not much different in the workplace, either. My SO is always coming home complaining about the guys (adult, mind you) who think they can make their own hours, stand around 1/2 the day doing nothing and then take long lunches. Work ethic doesn’t seem important anymore. I would think with this economy, people would give a little x-tra in the hope of KEEPING their job!
It’s so true! I started babysitting fairly young and did so well into my teens. I took my job very seriously and would never have dreamed of leaving the house a mess. I guess we had a pretty strong work ethic and sense of responsibility instilled in us. My husband and I rarely go out and a major reason for that is we don’t have any good go-to sitters.
I’m with you on the whole, “They’re not what they used to be.” I was exactly like you when I was young. It was my dream to be a babysitter. I’ve had several offers, most of whom I would NEVER consider. To me a good babysitter has to be known. What I mean is that I know their family and their family knows mine, possibly for years. This could be a high standard one that isn’t easily reached but that’s pretty important. This may sound crazy to say (since my oldest is 19 months and youngest not yet born) but I have to see that my children trust them. I’m blessed to have a LARGE family on my in-law side with lots of children to help out. One of my sister-in-laws, who just turned 15, is great with all children. She’s not the typical teenager. I would trust her with my newborn (if she could nurse
But my son trusts her and all of them and has never shown otherwise. However, I have seen him distrust some others that have offered their service. In fact our family is the only ones who have watched our son when we’ve gone out. I just can’t leave him alone with anyone else at this point. So much could happen and he couldn’t and wouldn’t tell me about it.
Finding competent sitters is frightening and exhausting! I was SO excited to babysit when I was a kid. Unfortunately we have two kids and no family near us. We just moved to a new city so don’t even have friends who we could turn to.
I have used a neighborhood teenager whose family we trusted. However, once we had kiddo #2 I didn’t feel comfortable with that either. Other than that I have only used college age and older.
I recently found a subscription site http://www.care.com that allows people interested in babysitting, pet sitting, or elderly care. It gives you the opportunity to view profiles and sometimes references and a background check if submitted. I have used several people and have been pleased.
I have been baby-sitting since age 10, now age 21. I always, always, always have gone beyond the call of duty and in my younger days (before bills) would spend a lot of my earnings on crafts and games to play with my charges. I also work at a daycare… I have seen the good the bad and the ugly in regards to childcare. It is important for parents to know what goes on when a baby-sitter is there, good luck to you all in finding a “perfect-fit” sitter!
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