Another trip?
February 1, 2009 by Christine - From Dates to Diapers
Filed under family life, thoughtful musings, travel
Ray and I are having a blast, exploring the City of Brotherly Love, but boy, do I miss my babies! It has been hard being away from my kiddos so much lately. Not only do I miss my kiddos, but I feel extremely guilt for leaving them for days at a time…
So, I bet you are wondering a) why Ray and I are in Philadelphia without the kiddos, and b) how I could leave my kiddos so much, right?
Well, the lovely folks at Campbell’s took a giant leap in to the world of social media, this week, by inviting 11 Mommy Bloggers to their World Headquarters in Camden, Jersey – I was one of them. They flew me out out and put me up in the Four Seasons Hotel for two nights, all expenses paid. More on that later.
Ray is on his way to New York for a business trip, and met me here in Philly to spend the weekend.
I return home on Sunday night.
Meanwhile, back at home, the kiddos are being well taken care of by Aunt Sara, Uncle Dustin, Aunt Lisa and Uncle Chuck. Ray and I owe them all BIG TIME!! Thanks, guys, for making this trip possible for us this weekend!
At the beginning of December, Ray and I left our three littlest guys with Mimi, Poppy, and my sister, Sara, while Disney flew us and the three oldest kiddos down to Disneyland for three days. Two weeks ago, I left Ray with the kiddos while I spent three days in New York City. And, next Thursday I fly to Nashville for the BlissDom conference, where I will be speaking.
That makes me a horrible mom, right?
My husband doesn’t think so. He is just as happy as I am for the opportunities that have been presented, and encourages me to travel to places I may not otherwise see. While I am excited for these opportunities, and feel honored to be invited to such fabulous events and speak at bloggy conferences, I feel like I am shirking responsibilities at home and with my kiddos. He says that I deserve some time away, seeing that I spend nearly every waking moment with my children.
While I don’t work outside of the home, these aren’t technically “business trips,” and no one is forcing me to go, I feel guilty. Perhaps I feel guilty leaving my kiddos because these really are just FUN trips. Or, maybe I’m just worried about what other people think when they discover that I am leaving my kiddos for another trip.
Ray says I need to stop worrying so much. I think he’s right.
Your husband is right! It is so hard to accept that we aren’t hurting our kids by taking some time away from them, but opportunities for you are a fabulous thing!! It can benefit your family and set an interesting example for your kids of all the possibilities there are in the world. Paid or not does not change the fact that you are showing them that moms are valuable to so many people, not just their own kids!
Enjoy your trips and then hug your kids a little extra when you’re home!
Girlfriend – I feel your pain. Especially since we are home school moms, there’s that extra little added Mommy Guilt pressure, isnt’ there.
I am going to Blissdom and then leading worship for a retreat in March, so I will be there right with you. If it makes you feel better, we can plan a little curriculum “date” at Blissdom or talk learning styles…will that make it feel more like business?
Awww, in a former life I was a tour guide and left my Son at home with his Grandma and I know the feeling of guilt. But as a divorced Mom I had to earn a living for us.
LISTEN to YOUR husband. His opinion is the only one that matters. Don’t worry about what other people will think of you.
I understand about the guilt you feel. Just think, you’ll be HOME before you know it and the time away from your kids will give everyone a chance to recharge!
Have fun my dear and ENJOY. Be thankful for friends and family that you trust with your children. That’s HUGE!!!!
I know exactly how you feel, but still I agree with Tanyetta – listen to your husband. You deserve fun trips, you deserve some adult only time on the business trips where you meet other women who are in exactly the same situation as you are – like me.
Oh Chris, I honestly think it is the “having fun” part that makes many of us most feel the most guilt.
I think you should definitely listen to your man because I’m willing to bet that there are several husbands that aren’t as supportive even though those women are deserving;)
Just enjoy the ride and think of all the stories you’ll get to share with your kiddos when they are older:) I bet they’ll be proud too once they are old enough to understand just how awesome of a blogging momma you are and why you are chosen to get to do this cool stuff.
P.S. No, you/we are not bad mothers, we are just trying to live a little doing adult things!
Don’t feel bad Christine! You are a great mom! Congrats on getting all of these cool trips by the way!
As a mom who also worry about what people think, I agree with previous comments and say, listen to your husband. It makes life better.
I’m still learning this, even in small ways, but it’s worth it. Enjoy yourself, and think how thrilled you’ll be to see your kids, and they you!
I’m glad that you have people who can help you with the kids!
The great thing about being a mom blogger is that all of these fun trips, meetups, conferences and the likes are parenting-related (for the most part) so I always consider it a little like “job training”! You learned stuff at Campbells about menu planning and healthy meals – that will definitely benefit your family! And the little heres and theres that might be just for you are SUPER important as well. I know that when I’m able to rejuvinate myself a bit, I’m more effective as a mother – more patient, more creative, more energetic, and so on.
I know it’s the hardest thing in the world to do, but we mamas need to cut ourselves a break every once in awhile! Enjoy it!
Aw Chris, not only are you a great mother, but you are one of the most incredible women I know! I feel the same guilt as you do when I leave, and I think that Lori is right — most of it is because while we are there at these events to do some business, the majority of the time we just end up having a ball. That’s ok, though — mommies, including you, are allowed to relax and have a little fun. These opportunities come in spurts, and before you know it there will be a stretch of time when you are home for quite a bit. Taking advantage of these great opportunities allows you to be a better mom to your kids and to provide them with things they wouldn’t otherwise be able to have (uh, hello Disney!).
Just remember that your kids, your husband, and all of us reading and leaving comments *know* you are a fantastic mom, so give yourself the credit you deserve!
Don’t feel bad, these are such wonderful opportunities for you! and your family!!